Thirty-One

Wohoo! I'm 31 right now.
No more insecurity like I felt when I was 29 turned to 30.
Yes I feel older, but now I'm overwhelmed with blessings.
31 years old with lots of experiences.
Experiences that might not belong to most people at my age.
The upside down life, emotional rollercoaster.
But at the end, everything happened better than I thought.
It's okay if I fall down and lose my spark.
Just make sure that when I get back up,
I rise as the whole damn fire.

All the tears had been paid off.
I live a life I've prayed before.
Not kinda perfect life according to most people.
But for me, my life is beautiful.
As perfect as I need.
Even when I feel broken, God reminds me that I'm chosen.
And now I know, God doesn't choose those who are fit.
He outfits those whom He chooses.
So why should I worry?
He has guaranteed my life an all the things that will happen.
Whatever will be, I will always be okay.
There's no need to rush.
If something is meant to be, it will happen.
In the right time, with the right person, for the best reason.




I'm nor single neither taken.
I'm building an empire, finding myself,
healing myself, loving myself,
being passionate, getting fit,
growing friendship, meeting new people,
and making memories.
That's relationship status of 31-year-old me.

5 Years for Tomorrow

Hey you there, how was life?
Yesterday I'd done something good, you must be proud of me. I gave speech in front of people (and also camera) about my commitment to creating an equal opportunity for all Indonesian children to attain a proper education, together with Hoshizora Foundation. That's not so me, and I know you think that so. I'm not kinda person with high confidence to talk in front of people, but yesterday I did it great! So many people like me, they all smiled at me, they hugged me, they said thank you, even they took pictures with me. At the moment, I feel so precious. Glad to feel that the older I get, the more good things I did. This is a good news for you too, right? I know you are the one who always support me, the one who will be very happy with my achievement.


This is me on "Hoshizora Summit 2019: Kita Bermimpi Berjuang Bersama" with Reky Martha, President of Hoshizora Foundation and teachers from Yogyakarta & Raja Ampat.


Okay then back to the tittle of this post, 5 years. What happen with 5 years? Actually, I'm not in a stable mood. Tomorrow I'm going to start a hard race, a race that might lead me to a better life. I hope so. Even I'm ready, still it's going to be hard. How I wish you were here. To listen what I feel, I think, I need. But I know you aren't able to be here with me, that's why I write this post. Because, maybe, someday, or maybe right away, you'll read this in another place. I will do something you asked for since 5 years ago. It took me so long to fully prepared. It took 5 years. Not kinda short time, but why do I have to hurry? At least I move, I move to a better life. Slow but sure.

You, in another place. But now it's not the time for us to talk.
Just keep watching me. Praying for me.
Hoping for a lot of happiness will come to me.